The Thirty-Third: TWO MONTHS

I have only two months left in China! This has put so much pressure on me.

1) I have so much to cover with my classes, so now I have all this prep work I need to do IMMEDIATELY. And though I had a free day today...nada.

Gonna wake up really early tomorrow to get some stuff done. Gotta work all weekend now.

2) I NEED TO GET OFF MY DUFF AND STUDY CHINESE SERIOUSLY BEFORE I GO HOME. 'TWILL BE TOTALLY PATHETIC IF I NEVER DID IT EVER.

3) I promised A that I would quit biting my nails here, and while I've been better about it, I've not quit.

But what I am the most concerned about (sadly) is now really want to come home hot. This swelling (expanding, exploding) desire has derailed all my recent mental health progress where I was happy at my weight and just wanted to be in shape.

Maybe I didn't actually make that progress.

So:

4) My skin. I have been so mean to it, and I hope serious Retin-A applications can fade the scarring lickety-split.

I've become super-disciplined about keeping up my skin care routine and not touching my skin EVER. (With the no nail-biting either, I am CONSTANTLY yanking my hands away from myself.)

5) My weight! According to the Spaniard's hotel scale and my clothing/eyes, I have not lost ANY weight since I came here, and I am no longer okay with that.

I just finally started pilates today. Will start running again tomorrow. (I'm nervous about finally confronting all the conditioning I've lost.)

Being very serious about diet. Been waking up to eat a large cafeteria breakfast, then a small lunch, then whatever fruit I want for the rest of the day. No chips, no junk. Lots of hunger. Motivation wavers hourly, because dieting totally sucks, and I'm really tired.

I wish I'd put more thought into it/could calculate the calories, but there's no time and not a lot of options in China. I can't imagine it's much less than 1200 calories, if that, so I'm sure it's fine. Two months won't kill me. Even if I am really, really tired.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.


P.S. I like this for my wedding dress:

































P.P.S. And I might like this purse:

































P.P.P.S. And, in an insane twist, I can actually afford them!

The Twenty-Fifth

I wish this were a how-to for her makeup, because I really like it.









This is certainly the prettiest I've ever seen her look. And oddly, though the makeup is quite evident, my overwhelming impression is of how natural it is.

Maybe if I take this to a makeup artist, he can recreate it? I forgot that I still have to figure that out for the wedding too.

You know it's crazy that the stereotype is that women let themselves go after they get married. It seems as if weddings inspire us to finally figure out how to make ourselves look good, so why would we just pitch that newfound knowledge out the window?

Don't blame the marriage, blame the kids!

The Twenty-Third

First there was this:















Which I thought would be so cheerful-yet-clean-and-simple-yet-not-killable on my future beautiful desk in my future beautiful condo with A.

Then there was this:


















Which is making me contemplate wedding centerpieces again.

It appears that I really like succulents.

The Twenty-Fourth

These just inspired me:














































What if we hung hundreds of clear (or subtle) ornaments in the trees at the wedding? They'd

sparkle
not require electricity
be unexpected at a summer wedding
(and therefore not overtly Christmas-y, I hope)
maybe make a pretty tinkling sound

And they're made for trees! They'd be so easy to hang!

And I bet they're super-cheap in bulk.

The Thirteenth: I've been reading too many wedding blogs.

link

I'm going to name all my daughters Glassine, and all the boys shall be Gocco.